Saturday, February 16, 2013



24 JAN 2013, will be a day that will be permanent etched in my heart. It is my dearest wife's birthday and deathday...................yes, she left us on the day she was born......age 52

Yes we lost the battle with cancer, and my wife was called home to God. The recovey she made during the early stages, was suddenly overtaken by an aggresive attack, and within afew weeks, such an active lady was reduced to a bedridden patient.

My daughter and I miss her dearly. But sometimes I think it is for the best. I cannot bear to see her suffering. My heart hurts so much to see her like that.

Thank God we had very good doctors and nurses, who kept her painless, throught the ordeal.
On the morning of 24 Jan 2013, me, my daughter, her brother and mother were at her side, we bought a small birthday cake, and sang her a final birthday song. After which she breath her last and left us for heaven at 1000hrs singapore time.

Now its comming close to a month, and her memories linger on in my heart and soul. Never aday passessby without me thinking of her and missing her so dearly.

Rest in Peace mummy, will catch up with you when my chores are done................

Thursday, May 3, 2012


Its been six months since my wife was diagnosed with colon cancer. Thank God, family and friends who were always there to give support and a helping hand . Things are looking rosy and the last CT scan done 2 weeks ago, gave us a reason to celebrate. Most of the affected organs have shown the cancer cells has disappeared or too small to be detected.
The only visible cancer is in the liver and this too has shrunk to half its original size. Our doctor was very happy with the recovery and maybe in 3 months with continuing treatment, this too will disappear.
We are very optimistic at this stage and are now back to some form of normalcy in our home.
To all those out there who are facing similar problems, my only advice is trust God, and leave in HOPE.
Stay optimistic and follow your doctors advice. 

Monday, October 24, 2011


my wife went in for her first chemo last thursday. i was beside her, watching them infuse the poison, into her. it was really heart breaking for me, to see such a lovely person so down and so sad. her eyes has lost that sparkle, and watching her in that situation, made me want to cry out . but how could i, i had to stay strong for both of us!

now after 4 days, and still on oral chemo at home, she is doing ok  i guess, not allowing it to bring her down any further, she has gone back to her daily chores. makes me a little happy, to see her busy as before, and running our household again....wash your hands!, wash your hands!... so nice  to hear those words again form my loving and dear wife... at least i have her back again....

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


Finally this dreaded disease has caught up with me.... i always thought that it will not reach my doorstep.. but it did finally.

My lovely and dearest wife was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer.
24 months thats the death sentence the doctors gave her. i still think i am in a dream, just waiting to wake up, and all this will just go away. but life being such, it always gives that kick and keeps on kicking till you are down.

So finally after accepting the situation, and tons of research, we are fighting back. we don't even know if we will see tomorrow's sunrise, so whats 24 months?...that's what i told my wife.
She will be going for chemo on the 20th oct 2011, but we are also trying some alternative medication. TCM, fruit juice, supper food , and sabah snake grass.

hope fully God willing we can overcome this little spanner that life has thrown into our home. I am trying my best to stay confident and being positive as my wife is. Hopefully we can fight this and live to tell our story to the many suffers out there.

Saturday, June 13, 2009


Datuk Zaid Ibrahim’s decision to join PKR, was expected, and came as no surprise to anyone. I hope his intellect and moderate stand will be a beacon of light to all Malaysians, to have hope of a better government in future.
I hope this lawyer with wide experience can help guide and transform Pakatan Rakyat into a formidable force in the next election……may the force be with you!

Zaid on his entry into PKR:

“I’m confident in the party’s cause. I believe I have an opportunity to assist Anwar and PKR,” said Zaid.

“I am ready to help Pakatan become an alternative and viable government that the people can rely on.”

Now will MCA leaders follow?

This is what Malaysian-insider has to say:

Zaid’s entry into PKR could be the push factor to convince a number of MCA leaders because he is considered a moderate Malay leader widely accepted by the Chinese community.

The former Umno man is also widely seen as someone who brings a more multi-racial approach to the opposition alliance because of his moderate views on Islam and race relations.

What about MIC?

So far no word from any of the MIC leaders yet, but I am sure there must be some rumbling in their backyard.

What will UMNO say?

Your guess is as good as mine……..cheers

Friday, June 12, 2009


I found this posting in Malaysia for ALL blog. this is one angry youth... it has 60 questions.

read it if you can spare the time cheers....

An open letter to PAS Deputy President Nasharuddin Mat Isa 

By An angry PAS youth leader (Malacca)

From: Malaysia for ALL blog

Ustaz Nasharuddin, when talking about PAS-Umno unity talk, please answer the following questions:

1. Why now?

2. Why not before the March 08 general elections?

3. What should we unite for? On what? About what? For what?

4. Is PAS a pure Islamic party that represents Malays and non-Malay Muslims or a Malay party?

5. What are the issues that we need to talk about? List them ONE by ONE. No cheap talk please!

6. Why PAS and Umno and not PAS, PKR DAP on one hand and Umno/BN on the other?

7. Why PAS and Umno and not PAS and PKR on one hand and Umno on the other?

8. Why you and not Najib Razak and Anwar Ibrahim, after all Anwar has more Malay support than you do and he is the head of Pakatan?

9. What is it that Umno lacks that need PAS support? The passage of Hudud laws in Parliament? Did Umno bring such laws to Parliament in the first place? And even if Umno were to do so, (which will never happen anyway), do we need to talk? Can't we support such amendments while we are pure PAS members in Parliament?

10. Why did we go into the elections to get PAS leaders of our own and now you are telling us that we need to follow Umno leaders? Do you know we paid many prices for being in PAS? Do you know that Umno tormented us for decades for being in PAS? Do we need to list the agony and pain we went through? Or Nik Aziz as Kelantan MB went through?

11. What is it that Umno led by Najib Razak realizes today that needs our support? Be specific. You aren't singing lullabies to children.

12. In what way do we keep the legacy of all past PAS Presidents by betraying their legacies when they left us for God's mercy?

13. Is Umno ready to improve the police, judiciary and civil service personnel that it needs our Parliamentary support?

14. And if that's the case, PKR and DAP will support such plans (which Umno will never do anyway), so when will we have PAS, PKR and DAP vs Umno “unity talk”?

15. Is it us who chose to be the enemies of Umno or Umno chose otherwise?

16. Is it us who tormented Umno people or it is us who paid heavy prices for being in PAS?

17. If the talk is about “issues concerning the nation” as you said, then why do we need constant talk about it in the media so much so that you fail in your parliamentary duties and as a PAS leader?

18. Is it PAS alone that's concerned about the nation? What about PR parties and NGOs? Are they part of the “issue driven discussions”?

19. Why are you interested in something that will divide PAS and make us lose focus while we are on threshold of achieving an imminent victory in the near future insya Allah?

20. Perak PAS Commissioner Ustaz Ahmad Awang revealed in the Muktamar that a “national PAS” leader has tried to influence him to accept an all Malay state government in Perak, who is this leader?

21. Do you think Malaysia as a nation state can continue to exist if we go on that road and impose Malay leadership on a state like Perak which has more than 45% non-Malay inhabitants?

22. In your opinion, was that leader right in suggesting that idea that Ustaz Ahmad Awang rejected?

23. Non-Muslims who have shunned us for 5 decades are running to us; do we embrace them and show them the hospitality and protection Islam offers them or do we return them to the “enemy” they ran from?

24. Umno started attacking the Chinese and Indians when they deserted Umno for PAS, yet Umno won in 1999 on Chinese and Indian vote and not Malay vote, why did Umno not call for Malay unity?

25. Is it only PAS that needs to be fearful of Malays when it gets non-Malay vote? Since when did PAS Malay supporters show enmity towards non-Muslim PAS supporters? Did PAS lose Malay ground by getting Chinese and Indian support? If that's the case, why is Umno desperately trying to woo them back?

26. Do you think Umno would talk of Malay unity if it was getting the “fixed deposit” Chinese and Indian votes as usual?

27. How would Islam's image be affected by your betrayal to the non-Muslims?

28. Do you know that for Islam to be implemented in Malaysia, we need the understanding of the non-Muslim community? Did we learn from Sudan's former military President Jaafar Nimeiri who imposed Sharia while ignoring the views of the non-Muslim community? Many Islamic scholars implored him to “at least” make the non-Muslim community to understand what was being done. But Nimeiri being a military man went ahead and declared Sudan an Islamic state and crushed all the opposition. Today, we have Southern Sudan (to be a separate nation in 2011) as a result. The nation continues to bleed till today. All it took was for one man to rush and pretend that he was intelligent and “God fearing” and that he was “uniting Muslims under God's decrees”.

29. Do you appreciate that Anwar Ibrahim and Lim Kit Siang have been useful to us?

30. Do you appreciate that DAP has improved our image in the Chinese heartland so much so that Chinese villagers who would have puked at seeing PAS's flag today overwhelmingly vote for us?

31. If yes, how do we repay them? Do we betray them and ignore them or we build better bridges with them and from thereon move forward and have our direct contact with the Chinese community established?

32. Do you appreciate that PKR and DAP have been useful to us? Between Umno and PKR and DAP, which party(ies) has helped us to be where we are now? Umno fought us, fights us and continues to do so in a cruel manner, do PKR and DAP do the same?

33. Do you believe PAS alone can rule Malaysia NOW? If yes, how? If not, how do we go about it?

34. Do you believe that Anwar Ibrahim's New Economic Agenda, the Lingam Tapes, his detailed NEP misuse information, his mistreatment at the hands of Umno, the 1998 episode, his charisma, his experience, his networks, his campaign for our members in different states and his ability to convince DAP leaders to stop attacking PAS and instead concentrate on Umno has been useful to PAS and enabled us to win in a number of places we couldn't imagine? Remember, it was only Anwar and Raja Petra Kamaruddin who repeatedly said Umno will be routed prior to the elections while BN media practically lynched Anwar and asked “who is Anwar”?

35. If your answer is yes, how do we repay him? Do we betray him now or we work with him and after he leaves, we install either you, Husam or Mohd Nizar as a replacement? If not, tell us how you won your seat in Yan in Kedah in 1999.

36. If you have popular Malay support, why did you lose in Besut? Why did PAS lose Terengganu since we are “more Malay” than Umno itself? Did you learn something? Why did Nik Aziz maintain his grip on Kelantan? Any lessons?

37. We used Mohd Nizar as an experiment and it yielded results; how do we achieve a national result now? And in what way does talking to Umno make PAS's ideals realized?

38. An Islamic party has a moral duty to its Muslim and non-Muslim friends. Why are you reluctant to have a “unity talk” with either PKR or DAP or at least PKR which is a multiracial party but a Malay majority party in the grip of Malay leadership as well? Where is your honour in showing respect to comrades who struggle(d) with you?

39. What are the similarities between Umno and PAS that necessitates talk in the first place?

40. Many of our leaders are victims of ISA and other cruel Umno engineered rulings just like all PKR and DAP leaders are as well, what are the ideals we share with Umno that calls for PAS to desert like-minded PKR and DAP leaders for Umno leaders like Najib, Nazri Aziz, Kerismuddin, Bung Mukhtar Radin and Khairy?

41. PAS contested non-Malay seats and won (take Dr Siti Mariah for example); PKR (Malay MPs) have contested non-Malay seats (take Zahrain Mohd Hashem of Penang-PKR) but DAP didn't contest a single seat with Malay majority. So, in what way does DAP constitute a danger to us?

42. If Malays are divided, who is to blame? And when did this division start? How and why was PKR formed? Why was PAS ejected out of BN when we joined them after we lost everything?

43. Which party closed its door on many Malays and even passed a resolution banning the return of any party member who has defected to another party? Umno! The same Umno wants Malay unity now? You buy that? And that unity is about what? After all, even a husband and a wife are not united!

44. PAS has been there for decades, were we united with Umno? If the unity talk is about issues, we supported Umno on certain issues in the past and we can do now when need be, so why talk about unity?

45. Does Umno have a heavenly decree to rule Malaysia and lead the Malays? Why NOT insist on PAS totally replacing Umno as the dominant party in Malaysia and lead Malaysia as well?

46. In what way do we achieve PAS's struggle by talking to Umno or uniting with it?

47. PKR and DAP have supported issue based discussions in the past. Anwar said he is ready to meet Najib on Perak. Anwar said he is ready to support constitutional changes that improve the judiciary and other state institutions. Lim Kit Siang repeated the same. But they didn't talk about PKR-Umno unity or Umno-DAP unity! Why us? Can't we be a constructive opposition party without ever meeting Umno face to face?

48. Why do you need to demoralize the highly charged PAS now?

49. Umno Kelantan leader Che-Alwi has called on Tok Guru Nik Aziz to resign since he couldn't get his “people” into PAS Central working committee, do you realise that it is you more than any one else who has divided PAS and is confusing the younger cadres? And do you cherish Umno leaders badmouthing PAS' most respected political figure? Yet you want to talk to Umno? So you want to reward them for humiliating Nik Aziz?

50. Khairy launched a scathing attack on Tok Guru Nik Aziz and hired Mat Rempits during last year's elections, he said Nik Aziz failed and can't provide leadership. He came up with the Pade-doh campaign that humiliated the elderly leader. Tok Guru cried and many of us did whatever we could to rally to him. The same Khairy today says we should unite. So you support Khairy instead of Nik Aziz? For you Khairy and his ilk are better than Nik Aziz? Explain yourself!

51. Why are you wasting PAS's time on irrelevant issues that will never happen rather than strengthen the party, raise its profile among the unwilling Malay supporters and further engage the non-Malays, Sarawakians and Sabahans?

52. Why are you silent? Why is Utusan your media? Why not the popular blogs, Malaysiakini, Malaysian Insider, Malaysia-Today, The Nutgraph etc?

53. Tell us what you have done for PAS and PR in regard to making policies, revising them or coming up with issues that are of concern to Malaysians.

54. Rather than wasting your time in seeking Utusan Malaysia coverage, why not spend time with PAS's soldiers in the trenches in Negri Sembilan, Johore, Pahang, Malacca and other states who are preparing for the future?

55. Umno won't give PAS the PM post, so why should we talk? Doesn't that mean you despise your own leaders?

56. You can't manage a simple victory like the one we have had now, how do you intend to manage a bigger one? You are exactly the kind of leaders martyr Sayid Qutb warned against when he wrote in his “This Religion” book that an Islamic leader who can't manage victory will betray Islam's cause.

57. Do you know for a leader to succeed, he has to be loved by his soldiers? Why are you making yourself hated in PAS and Pakatan? Why not listen to what the voters want? Are you honest with your Creator and yourself and with us?

58. What gives you the strength to contradict Tok Guru Nik Aziz? Is he your age-mate? Can you tell us one achievement he has accomplished on any front that you remotely even tried to achieve let alone achieving?

59. Many people (the intellectuals, economists, authors, NGO's and highly educated/urbanite Malays) don't understand PAS. What have you done in the past one year for them to understand us? What have you done to make PAS liked by all people so that it becomes a giant party in the future and even rule alone or with PKR?

60. Umno is for racism which is haram in Islam, selective justice, tribal hegemony, oppression, exploitation, endemic corruption, family rule, hatred, division, lies, sodomy and dirty politics, total destruction of state institutions (look at Perak), and in Umno's history, it has the least popular leader in Najib Razak today. For God's sake, what do we benefit from such a party and scandalized leadership? Do you believe we share more with Umno than with PKR and DAP?

We are waiting for answers and we demand them now. We are becoming impatient. When we voted for you (including myself who is a youth leader from Malacca), we did it because we hate to humiliate incumbent leaders and your age also mattered.

You were young and we thought a new chance had to be given to you. Removing an incumbent was more traumatizing for us as PAS members than installing a new one. That is why Datuk Husam Musa was not elected. It is not that he is not liked. He is indeed. Far more liked than you. From now on, we demand that you stop your unity talk nonsense and concentrate on PAS and PR. Otherwise tell us the truth and then we can go our separate ways. As simple as that!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009


KUALA LUMPUR (June 8, 2009) :
The Education Ministry wants to make a pass in English compulsory for students to obtain their Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia.

Dear DPM Muhyiddin,

Your heart is in the right place, but your brains is a non starter! do you know how many students are going to fail if this imbecillic idea is implemented!....

you cannot teach old dogs new tricks, was justly said.  if you really want our schools to improve, start at the very bottom of the chain. yes start with the pre school and primary ones. it will take 17 years from now to have a batch of decent english speaking students, but thats the way it should be!.... no quick fix super glue ,here and there.... it must start from the roots, only then the tree will be strong.

it's just like telling all your ministers to study hindi, and if they fail, they will be kicked out. i guess no minister's will be left. thats the problem with you people, all you want is quick fix without having any real concept of reality. 

to start with, do you have the logistics ? do you have the teachers ? i guess thats why it is said that the the art of politics is to look for trouble, finding it everywhere , diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies!

although you see the need to master english (which is good), is far sighted and malaysia needs it rightly so, you have to be more patience in the implementation. it took 25 years for the system to change from english  to bahasa, so if really want the best for our future, start at the roots and stop barking at the wrong tree.....cheers

Sunday, June 7, 2009


What is 1Malaysia?

Our country will mesmerize the WORLD if only 1MALAYSIA follow these steps!

The CAT concept

1) having a Competent government
2) having a Accountable government
3) having a Transparent government….. in short a CAT system

The separation of powers concept

1) the executive, the legislative, the judiciary, the monarchy should be strictly independent.
2) A neutral party (royal commission) with draconian powers to investigate and bring to justices all the wrong doers in the four branches of the government, without fear or favor.

The civil service concept

1) to free the civil service of political baggage
2) to implement a system of meritocracy
3) to provide service that transcends ethnic and racial discrimination and to bastardise cronyism and nepotism

The publico philosophy concept

1) to create an atmosphere of racial harmony by removing all racial barriers and throwing the books at racist (Start with Awang Selamat ).
2) To have a world class education system, by nurturing the best young brains and hiring the best intellectual’s to teach and educated our young.
3) To implement a policy of equitable distribution of wealth and to rid the country of corruption, hypocrites, neantherdal politicians and brain deficiencies moronic leaders masquerading as statesman.

Malaysia is such a beautiful country, gifted with much natural resources and talent. But after 50 years of independence , we still no where what our neighbour Singapore is. Look at their education system, transport system, health system, housing system all world class, all archived with almost zero natural resources. Why can’t we be like them? For one thing, with people like the psycho Awang Selamat still running loose in our neighbourhood, and sodomizing the harmony of our nation with his idiotic malaise we will still be a third world country come another 50 years!

Thursday, May 28, 2009


When retired government servants are maneuvered to a corner, and their rice bowl is sodomized, then all the conspiracy and dirty laundry comes out in public...

Mat Zain has finally lite the fuse too an explosive story which, i can only assume will send many people running for cover. The blogger sphere will be running out of broadband space with these explosive story for the next few days.

Many high profile people were mentioned in his statement, so will all these moronic scrotum bags, who masquerade as esteemed stalwart of law and order in bolehland, finally see doom?

I guess not, as these chauvinist draconian beneficiaries who assume that its their birthright to rape, bastardise and mortgage our bolehland, will yet find another loophole to counter this transgression of their private play ground. As it was once said "our path is such that even angels dare not tread.

So Mat Zain, I only hope you will not be another PI bala, but if you intend to stay and fight, may God protect you........cheers

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


NH Chan, a retired judge of the courts of Appeal wrote in the malaysian insider that the three judges of the court of appeal which heard the Nizar/zambry appeal on who is the true MB, has said the that the judgment is wrong.

Now why am I not surprised? Everybody in Perak and Malaysia (except for BN ) knows these as for a fact. The learned judge NH Chan gave a detailed breakdown of the facts in his article in the insider. He even priased the High Court judge Abdul Aziz for the impeccable judgement.

a small extract of NH CHANS article from malaysianinsider:

It seems to us ordinary folk that the Court of Appeal has missed the point. They decided that Zambry was properly appointed Mentri Besar under Article XVI(6). That is not correct — he could only be appointed under Article XVI(2)(a). Since there cannot be two Mentri Besar and Nizar the incumbent Mentri Besar has not resigned and, further, since the legislative assembly did not decide if he has ceased to command the confidence of the majority of the members of the assembly, Nizar, unquestionably, is still the Mentri Besar of Perak.

Before I sign off, I wish to say a few nice words to the High Court judge. Mr Justice Abul Aziz Abdul Rahim is a fantastic judge. The judgment, especially the piece on the interpretation of Article XVI(6), is so good that it has persuaded me to change my mind on my view of Article XVI(6). If you remember my first article, I have expressed an opinion on Article XVI(6). Now I know I was wrong — and I have to thank Abdul Aziz J for showing me the way.

So now can we throw the books at these three judges, for the wrong judgement?